Patience may be a virtue, but there are limits when you are shopping

A survey a few weeks ago suggested that customers don't want to stand in line for any length of time, and that if they aren't served promptly, they might just leave the business and not come back.
Patience is a virtue, so we are told as youngsters, but sometimes it is necessary to be patient because we receive too much service.
With some gift certificates received at Christmas safely stowed in my purse, and with housemate in the car waiting patiently for me to finish my shopping, I ventured into the chain store in a distant location.
I didn't know for sure what I might be able to trade for my certificates but decided to browse in case a piece of clothing jumped out at me from the racks.
The only thing that jumped out at me was the sales associate. I hardly had my umbrella closed and the rain drops brushed from my purse and there she was, welcoming me in gushing terms to the store.
With barely a pause while she gulped for air, she explained about the sales, the extra markdowns on certain items and the new merchandise that had just been put on display.
"Now, where would you like to start?" she asked, looking like she would win any foot race to get me the perfect top.
I hated to do it after such an impassioned sales pitch, but I provided her with the deflating information that "I just want to browse, thanks."
Browsing was obviously a foreign concept to her, for she didn't back off one step. Instead she stayed at my elbow as I sidled away towards a display of pantsuits. Now I know how whales feel when they try to get rid of barnacles.
I looked at one item closely, thinking it might work for an engagement at a convention. She immediately informed me she could find a blouse that would match. I thanked her and moved on, hoping another customer would claim her attention.
I wasn't that lucky.
With my shadow intact, I continued my foray in clothes land, but I was quickly losing my good feeling about this particular establishment and the zealous attendant who couldn't see that she was getting on my nerves.
After rebuffing another offer to show me an outfit that "would be perfect for you" I put some chill in my voice and advised her that I would call on her if I needed any more help, that I was really there just to browse.
Thankfully her attention was claimed by a colleague and I scuttled away to the other side of the store.
I found two items to try on, and considered a third before she found me again. "There you are," she exclaimed as though she had found a long lost friend.
She was absolutely ecstatic when I said I would like to try on my choices and led me like a queen to a dressing room, with the promise to help me find different sizes if I needed them.
Wonderful.
I locked the dressing room door to keep her out, but she hovered right outside, asking several times how I was doing and if I wanted some help. I expected to see her popping her head under the short door.
Give me patience.
One jacket fit, and I might have tried on some more except for Clerkzilla, who glumly took my selection and my rejects to the cash register.
The presentation of my gift certificate flummoxed her. She explained that she hadn't yet figured out the new computer system and hoped I would be patient with her. Did I have any patience left?
Fifteen minutes later she and two colleagues were still trying to figure out how to give me customer satisfaction.
Finally, with bag in hand, I scurried out of the store, flung my purchase in the back seat and pulled out of the parking lot. Housemate also got an earful.
Back home a few days later, I opened the store's bag to take out my new jacket.
My ever helpful clerk, bless her heart, had given me one of the jackets I had decided not to buy.
I haven't decided yet if I will return it at a sister store close to home, and risk the possibility that she's been transferred here to help me.
On the other hand, I might just keep the offending garment to remind me about patience being a virtue and being pleasant to barnacles.

Joyce Walter can be reached at 691-1259.