Open discourse is good, but some go too far

Anyone who has ever read the online edition of our newspaper when a multiplex-related story has been posted is probably aware of the multitude of online comments that can, on occasion, become somewhat nasty.
Actually, they can be absolutely downright vicious. It amazes me so much anger can exist within the hearts of residents from a community commonly referred to as the Friendly City. This is an ongoing trend I, for one, see as unfortunate.
Please don't misinterpret me as being anti-freedom of expression. Certainly, I feel people should be able to share their concerns on a given topic any way they see fit (provided it doesn't violate the Times-Herald rules for submitting comments online).
However, it also seems to me the sort of negative emotional online banter between certain proplexers and noplexers does nothing to further the ultimate human cause of being nice and considering all sentient beings with unconditional compassion (at least those are the ultimate goals in my opinion).
Of course, I believe the sort of negative commenting going on our website doesn't represent the general opinion of people regarding the multiplex issue. Sure, people might have strong feelings on the topic, but most people are tolerant of others' opinions.
I recently interviewed a regular Moose Javian about whether she thought the multiplex debate would split the city. The woman used her own family as an example. Basically, she is totally against the project, while her husband is very much in favour of it. However, despite their opposing passions on this particular topic, they still like each other and are still a family.
Similar to that woman and her husband, I suspect the majority of citizens don't take differing opinions on the multiplex either personally or too seriously. However, what I see on our website are comments that can be quite hurtful at times, made by people whose identity is protected by the anonymity of the internet.
This seems a rather unfortunate way to communicate a point of view. The problem with insulting someone is, once those words leave your mouth (or keyboard as it might be), there really is no way of retrieving the harm done.
I can't remember the details of this parable, but the basic story goes as follows:
A man goes around town insulting this other guy. However, once he finishes telling everyone what a jerk the other guy is, the man realizes (for some reason) his comments were untrue and wrong.
So the man goes to the other guy and asks how he might make amends. The harmed individual tells the wrongdoer to take a feather pillow and spread its contents around the town.
It's a windy day when the man does this, so the feathers are quickly whisked away. However, when he returns to see if all is good now, the other guy says that was only half the task required for his forgiveness.
Next, he tells the man to go collect all the feathers.
And so, like with that little parable, hurtful words are near impossible to recover once they enter the universe. Anyone who reads a mean online comment might remember something about it, with his or her opinion of the person mentioned in that comment forever changed towards the negative.
I'm not a perfect example of mindful speech, but I do recognize how much suffering can result from a cruel utterance or a few thoughtless keystrokes.
Don't let something as inconsequential as a multiplex project delude you into thinking all sentient beings are not interconnected.

Carter Haydu can be reached at 691-1265.

observer: - September 18th, 2009 at 18:04:51

I kind of agree with John, when this kind of discourse starts getting out of hand it is high time to start looking at the underlying causes.
But sorry to say this has been going on for far too long. Which doesn`t say too much for those who have the power to address the situation and haven`t. After all is it not their place to address the concerns of the citizens and promote a cohesive community?

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saskgal: - September 18th, 2009 at 17:58:15

Finally a level head prevails. We are all entitled to our opinions... but what we fail to recognize most of the time is it is just that.. it is only an opinion. Feeling passionate about what you believe in is great... but a decent human being will accept that the other person is also entitled to an opinion... and an opinion isn't right or wrong.

John: - September 18th, 2009 at 17:57:00

I agree to a point.

But I think one should step back and take a look at the whole picture.

The odd personal criticism is to be expected in this day and age, especially with the variety of people and their characters, beliefs and values. But when you start to see a proportionally increasing number of such incidents or an increase in their callousness, alarms should start going off.

When the powers that be, fail to address the situation with a balanced, neutral approach only further frustration and conflict will ensue. But when the powers that be are at the source of the problem, one only needs to look at some of the great riots or even civil wars to see how far these types of conflicts can escalate to.

No I agree these types of personal attacks should not be accepted, but at the same time they should be a barometer for a bigger problem. And if those in power fail to see them as such and fail to act accordingly, they have no place in office!

James: - September 18th, 2009 at 17:41:43

I would say that politicians and reporters who can't stand the heat should stay out of the kitchen. Have a good day.

James: - September 18th, 2009 at 17:39:31

Why can't the reporter say he supports the Multiplex? Have a good day - I am.

Another Dave: - September 18th, 2009 at 17:18:21

Hey Elihu. You conveniently forgot to mention that they have a huge savings account and still have monies coming in the door...

Susan: - September 18th, 2009 at 16:32:45

Thank you for your comments Carter. Much appreciated. Emotions running so high over a local issue can create many childish responses to each other and I agree that they don't define Moose Jaw as a population. While the veneer friendliness shown to newcomers like myself may not run too deeply in a city as well established by multigenerational families who built this city and have remained here, the level of friendliness that is shown is certainly sincere as far as it goes. The level of welcome I have received is a tribute to this indeed friendly city in a world where suspicion of anyone new is sadly becoming a more and more well founded concern. Moose Jaw is a great place in so many ways and I hope we don't ever have just cause to lose the friendliness we retain.

Elihu: - September 18th, 2009 at 16:23:39

Hey Another Dave, you forgot that one quarter of their household income comes from the savings.

Give it up, it's a stupid idea.

Elihu: - September 18th, 2009 at 15:57:02

Carter, it is not as simple as hard feelings and respect for one another. I see it as being very much the same as a household where the hubby wants to borrow three years wages on a ski boat, while the wifey doesn't. Their wages are already used up on expenses, the only way they can afford it is to work harder. No amount of respect will change the fact that this is a stupid lifestyle choice, and whether the couple is respectful to each other or not they are destined for financial ruin.

Pro-plexers want the boat and don't care how much it costs, anti-plexers don't, it's that simple. If this goes through, we are ALL saddled with the cost, whether we individually want the boat or not.